What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

ATTENTION SPIKES UP. What could he want with me? Did I do something wrong? Lord did I forget to pay something? Questions start flying through my head. What would the detention center sheriff want with me?

I'm sorry to bother you, my staff just told me our guy corrected his information and had a number off for his home phone. Have a good day. Hangs up.

{RING} {RING}

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Sure no problem officer.

I hear a pause on the line, it goes quiet for a few seconds.

Do you reside at 1234 X X Lane?

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Hi this is Sargent Moss from the County detention center. Is this Sean?

Yes sir it is.

HELLO

Why am I sweating so much when I try to do anything?

Whew, not in trouble!! But someone named Sean with a similar number is apparently about to have a rather bad day.

Looks at phone, sees a number local to me, so I answered.

After a few moments he returns.

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No sir I sure don't, I live in the next city over.

I was trying to reach out to you because we have a Mr X here, who claims you are his legal guardian. He needs you to come down and sign some forms.

Do what? Officer, I'm sorry I have no kids of my own, and I don't know anybody by that name.

Is anyone else losing complete respect for the US at this point?

Long pause, OK. (Inaudible talking). Could you hang on for just a sec?

Is your number (xxx) xxx-xxxx??